A Forlorn Sight; Condolences to myself.

This is the gloomiest week for me. I’m welcoming the specter of me, specter of separation that perhaps no one wish to feel. But anyway this is life, you can get whatever you never wish before. Back again, I’m consciously noticed that someday this gloomy moments will appear. Thought I’m ready. Lessons that we found…

My never-ready self

An ended day always taught us lessons, told us stories&plans to be chosen. Today we might be here together, sharing the same laughs, hugs, foods, blankets and others – without knowing what will happen in a minute after. Another day may not be the same, the laughs, the hugs, the foods, the blankets and others…

When we know it, we know it.

People are boxed themselves with their own issue in their own circumstances. Sometimes, I did that in order to tell my self that we have our own privacy and so I didn’t feel bothered. But not today, not today. My feelings are scattered, I feel like hundred of  sharp needles with big syringes injected to…

Meaningless is hurtful.

I came to a realization that when we were saying a word too much, it has less meaning and losing its’ purposes. Mostly it comes when we’re trying to apologizing, I really understand the word ‘sorry’ and its’ derivatives has a strong purposes when we really mean it. That’s cliche. That’s also a rhetorical. We…

Kamu = musim gugur.

Jalan tertunduk, meremas kertas; adakah dendam? Aku lupa apakah ada kita di masa lampau yang sama? Ketika kita saling bertaut, seperti ada cerita yang kita tau.  Aku rasa bukan dendam, hanya kesal karena pagi ini kamu lupa kopi mu.  Kita masih dalam diam, kamu pindah dari bangku itu; tepat dalam singkapan mata ku kedepan. Aku…

Sunday Morning Thoughts

I know people changes, we just have to accept it. Whenever things changed a bit, I feel it. I repeat to myself whether it’s only an intuition of mine or it’s a reality. Even we have to accept it, the process in your brain to really realize and ready to take what’s behind the change…

What You/I/We Wished (part 2) – Arrived in New York City

Let me try to finish this untold story. Akhirnya, Februari 2016 lalu kami ber-9 berangkat. Saya, Ocha, Hani, Arum, Fanda&Ekky berangkat dari Surabaya dan transit di Jakarta, langsung ketemu sama Maul, Ben dan Yosar disana. Thank God, karena yang mengerikan adalah perjalanan domestik dan kapasitas bagasi maskapai yg hanya 20kg/penumpang. Even my luggage is 23kg…

Tipis.

Syukur dan sukur adalah kata berbeda yang mirip. Kedua nya aku amini, karena jangan lupa; semesta berkonspirasi dalam semua partikel perjalanan ini. Selain torehan luka dengan garam, semesta juga berkonspirasi dalam manisnya karamel di atas pudingmu.

land of the dream-junkies.

Ellis Lacey, an innocent Irish girl that never expect her life to change until her sister send her to Brooklyn, NY, America.  This movie nominated in OSCAR for best picture, best actress and best adapted screenplay. Well, speaking of which I’m not telling or reviewing any movie here but let me spread some words. If you guys…

It is not always what it is.

Here’s the thing; I’ve been more unstable, more cranky, more moody than now. I’m not saying someone has changed me, since it was heard so cliché, it is indeed impossible to have change that not come from yourself. Firdaus, my very best-fight friend and also a partner for more than… years (I don’t know how…

What You/I/We Wished (part 1)

2007. Little Manhattan  Jaman itu ibu bapak masang tv kabel buat hiburan anak-anaknya biar anteng (gak kebanyakan layangan terus tangan nya kapalan), selain nonton kartun, HBO pas tahun segitu nanyangin film Little Manhattan yang aktor nya sekarang terkenal banget gara-gara film The Hunger Games, Josh Huterchon. As we can read from the title…. mostly, scenes were took place…

salju

salju itu cantik, salju itu siap dengan hempasan tubuhku, salju itu melankolis dan introvert, salju itu turun dengan kalem seperti nina bobo ibu kepada anaknya, ternyata salju itu cantik hanya dari jendela, tidak; salju datang ramai-ramai meninggalkan kemerahan di hidung dan telingamu, ternyata salju menggoreskan luka di kutikula, ternyata dia menghambat kaki mu untuk lebih…